Kevin O'Bryan

Category: Lifestyle

  • Reading 2023: Memoirs all year long

    Reading 2023: Memoirs all year long

    I would say I’m surprised that it’s almost the end of March 2023 already, however, the way time’s been running along, it feels like the new year has just begun (for me anyway).

    With a new year comes new reading adventures and I am here for it. This year I’m taking a different and ‘novel’ approach to my official reading list.

    After a year of reading multiple genres, based on last year’s list I decided to focus on a single genre of writing for this year, therefore the list will comprise memoirs and biographies only. I was inspired in part by Viola Davis’s memoir which reminded me of the power of a well written tale of someone’s life. It also connected me with the story of an artist that I admire.

    As with anything I do, the list of memoirs are eclectic and will cover many areas, while still satisfying my interest in the lives of the people being chronicled.

    The other big change is that I won’t be assigning specific months for reading as I’ll be taking these books on as I’m led.

     I do hope you love my book selections and will be inspired enough to choose a fave or two from the list. Some of the links below are affiliate links. This means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn an affiliate commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

    Dust Tracks on a Road: An Autobiography (P.S.) by Zora Neale Hurston

    I read Their Eyes Were Watching God years ago and since that time I’ve been committed to connecting with Zora Neale Hurston as much as possible. I got one step closer last year when I read Barracoon   so it is only fitting that this year I read her autobiography.  Get your copy here .

    The Urgent Life: My Story of Love, Loss, and Survival by Bozoma Saint John

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    Many years ago I discovered Bozoma Saint John when she was head of marketing at Apple Music. I was fascinated by her sheer presence. She seems to own every moment she inhabits in a world that often doesn’t acknowledge or appreciate black women. Since that time, she has made several career moves, so when I discovered she was publishing this book, I was excited by the prospect to get to know more about her in a deeper way. Get your copy here.

     

    Sugar in the Blood: A Family’s Story of Slavery and Empire by

    As I continue to look at the history of slavery, colonisation and conquest, this particular memoir provides another perspective that we don’t often get to observe. Even as I explore my own history and that of my ancestors, peeling back the layers continues to reveal more. Get your copy here.

     Spare by Prince Harry

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    Curiosity has gotten the best of me and I wanted to read his words, unfiltered. Not to understand but to know. Not much more to it. Get your copy here.

     

    I’ll Never Write My Memoirs by Grace Jones

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    Grace Jones has existed for my entire life and it feels as if she has lived so many lifetimes. This Jamaican superstar is the epitome of where I come from is not where I have to stay. I can’t wait to learn more about her incredible life, so far. Get your copy here.

    From Harvey River: A Memoir of My Mother and Her Island by Lorna Goodison

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    I’ve loved the work of Lorna Goodison ever since I encountered ‘Bella Makes Life’ in high school. This book is also touching on another area of my fascination, Jamaica in the past. Get your copy here.

     

    Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover

    The premise of this book connects with me due to the abnormal childhood of the author. Education has been such an important benefit to my life, it is interesting to learn just how it changed the author’s own life. Get your copy here.

    A Visible Man: A Memoir by Edward Enninful

    Edward Enninful first grabbed my attention based on his work and association with Naomi Campbell. That he is now editor of British Vogue is no small feat and I am fascinated by the life of someone with such a powerful position in media. I’m looking forward to learn even more about his background and his rise. Get your copy here.

     

    I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy

    I’ve been an adult for a while so I was not exactly the target audience for Jennette McCurdy’s work on iCarly back in the day. I was however obsessed with SpongeBob Squarepants, so invariably, I came into contact with her work on the show. The title of her memoir grabbed me and as irreverent as it sounds, I want to explore.  Get your copy here.

    My aim this year is to have fun while learning and being inspired. Here’s hoping these books as well as any additional novels I read will help me to accomplish that. Let me know what you are reading this year.

    Be inspired, Be informed, Be Glorious!

    Subscribe to the blog here  and share your content suggestions here.

  • Making Space by Clearing Space

    Making Space by Clearing Space

    Happy 2023!

    Did you miss me? Because I sure missed you guys.

    I don’t intend to do a recap of 2022, needless to say, it was a good year mixed with learnings and changes that are seeds for my future.

    It’s because of the 2022 experience that I can confidently say that I have a number of things brewing and my excitement is uncontainable. 2023 for me is the year to do many things, while afraid.

    Now due to some changing circumstances in my life, I’ve had to pay keener attention to maximizing my physical space and declutter, even more than usual. The result, I got rid of a lot of my past in the form of papers, random items, clothes, memorabilia and other things I thought I would never be able to part with.

    This has all coincided with a major move I made in 2021 from one living space to another, so during the year I slowly settled in and sought to find new dimensions within the space. The process is just about complete and along the way, I’ve found some simple products that have helped me to better utilize space around my home in the most surprising ways.

    Unpacking the baggage before the stuff

    Before I get to the products, however I just want to say something more about the process of truly decluttering and beginning to appreciate the fullness and clarity that comes with starting over and creating space. It has been empowering to untether myself from physical items and connections that I previously thought I could not live without. And while the ultimate manifestation and change is physical, there has been a mental and emotional emancipation, that turns out to be the biggest blessing.

    I can live without anything that I choose as long as I remain, because in the end, none of it matters, it’s just ‘stuff’. After everything that the pandemic revealed, it all makes sense and I am the better for it.

    With that said, let’s go to the list of ‘stuff’ I am hoping will help you, better organize around the home.

    As is customary, the links below are affiliate links. This means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn an affiliate commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

    Bamboo Mug Holder Tree

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    As simple as the concept may seem, this nifty mug holder tree made of bamboo helps you to save lot of space. I figured it would be a good idea to get it when I realized that my cups were taking up space that could be used otherwise. It’s small enough to not take up too much counter space and holds 6 cups of varying sizes, ensuring that they are always readily at hand.

    Flat plugs

    These are items I never thought I would need. If like me you have ever had to worry about a large piece of furniture crushing or bending a power chord in an outlet, then these flat plugs will solve that. I notice that some electronic items now come with these style of plugs but for the items you already own, these will help you to move your furniture all the way to the wall to create even more space.

    Under-bed Storage Containers

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    There are numerous solutions available for under bed storage but these containers proved to be just what I needed. They have ample internal storage space, have a clear top and have handles that make moving them around easy. They are also quite durable and come with a solid inner lining to keep them sturdy.

    Clear plastic organizer drawers

    Before I moved I thought I had a good plan for my bathroom countertop but I gradually realized that I didn’t and stuff were simply everywhere. So when I saw this clear plastic drawer setup I decided that I found my solution. Not only is it neat and fits easily in a small space, but it protects items from dust build up. Good aesthetics, streamlined storage and space saving, it checks all the boxes, literally.

    Plate holders

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    Sometimes all you need is a change of perspective to make a difference in your storage and space saving. I was always storing my dishes in the cupboard flat, then I saw these plate holders, made some measurements and realized how much more space I would have, by storing them vertically. Even better, they are made of metal with added rubber to protect the plates and come in a pair.

    Over Door hooks

    Whenever you run out of space, always go up and use vertical space where ever it’s available. I wanted some special over door hooks but couldn’t find a solution that fit my needs, then I saw these hooks . They are perfect and can hang multiple items, easily.

    Dish Drying Rack

    You know you’re grown when buying a dish drainer is exciting. So I went searching for a dish drying rack and when I found this one, I was sold! It had everything I wanted and honestly, I have never seen one like it before and aside from the drying mat that’s include, it has a drainer spout that’s adjustable.

    These are just a few of the items that have helped me maximize my space, physically and helped with my mental equilibrium. They might help you do the same.

    Let me know in the comments some of your space saving hacks!

    Be inspired, Be informed, Be Glorious!

    Subscribe to the blog here  and share your content suggestions here.

    Kevin

     

  • 8 Travel essentials you will want to Own

    8 Travel essentials you will want to Own

    If you’ve seen the news or just general information available online, you would know that travelling in the summer of 2022 is an extreme sport, just read this. With all the chaos, you would assume that the thought of travel would be the farthest thing from the minds of anyone with sense. However the pent up need to just ‘be outside’ due to the panorama, means that folk are rearing and ready to catch flights.

    With this new spotlight on travel and all the things that could possibly go wrong, I recalled a post I made close to five years ago with some general tips on how to make your trips smoother.  I stand by those recommendations but thought that half a decade on, there was need for an updated list of must-have items for travel, think vacay vibes but also practical and essential.

    These are items I have either used previously or they are updates to stuff I already own. Some are completely new but worthy and useful additions that I believe will be beneficial in many situations.

    As a side bar, I do hope you love my choices and will choose to grab some of these items for your next big outing. Some of the links below are affiliate links. This means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn an affiliate commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

    Luggage Tags

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    I have cycled through many different types of luggage tags over the years, so when it came time to take stock of the ones I already owned, I realized that they were a bit too muted for my liking. And with people having their luggage delayed or lost due to everything that’s now happening with global travel, I want my luggage to standout.

    I found these BlueCosto luggage tags that come in two sizes, on Amazon and they are perfect. The colours are bright the tags are hefty, inconspicuous and even have a neat privacy cover to protect your address. I also like the metal wire attachment as it seems quite sturdy and durable.

    Passport holder

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    I can recall the moment a border control officer in a foreign country, ripped the plastic covering from my passport, unprovoked. It was not sticking out, or inhibiting his ability to check the passport, but I assume he just felt like it was a nuisance.

    Since then, I’ve decided to keep my passport pretty free of any covering that encloses it but I want a holder to store it in that protect it from the sweat of my hand or just general handling. I went looking and landed on this passport holder –  that looks cute and also comes with RFID protection. This basically means that unscrupulous persons can’t use devices to pull the embedded data from my passport. I have recommended this item previously here so if you haven’t gotten it already, do it now.

    Birkenstocks

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    I love wearing sandals, the more comfortable the better, so when I realized that there was a series of Birkenstocks (that I could actually afford) I decided to grab one in black. Best purchase ever!!

    The Birkenstock Unisex Arizona Essentials EVA Sandal is comfortable, breathable and just an all -around good option if like me, you hate that other popular footwear ‘staple’ that rhymes with pots.

    They are unisex, come in some pretty interesting colours and as I stated before are very wearable. I’ve have even received a few compliments when I wear mine on the street.

    Cellphone Tripod

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    If you’re travelling, then at some point you will probably want to get photos. I shivered when I discovered this tripod, selfie stick combination. It’s made of aluminum, has a max length of 60 inches and comes with a bluetooth enabled remote. It is sleek, lightweight yet sturdy and feels like a baton when all the components are together. What’s even better it comes with a storage bag and is easy to use.

    Portable Door Lock

    Planning on staying in a hotel anytime soon? Then you may want to consider getting this portable door lock. I’ve seen this version recommended over the years and also saw demonstrations in video. So to be on the safe side, it may be useful to get one of these, or two. It is easy to use and is adjustable to more than one door lock size.

    Mini refillable perfume atomizer

    I’ve known folks who have had the following nightmare scenario happen to them – they travelled and had an expensive bottle of cologne in their luggage. They happen to leave it in their hotel room only to return and that bottle of cologne is missing. Also, it seems cologne sometimes goes missing from checked luggage in airports during transit. Let me introduce the mini refillable perfume atomizer that can help you to travel with your favourite colognes in small batches without the risk of misplacing the entire bottle. They are light weight, easy to fill and fit just about anywhere.

    Credit Card RFID Sleeve

    New credit and debit cards that use tap technology for transactions are also at risk for access by unscrupulous persons with RFID readers. Thankfully these nifty Samsonite RFID blocking sleeves  can help you to protect your cards. These are good for travel or just for normal use so add them to your cyber security arsenal.

    Waterproof Cellphone holder

    This is a vacation must have if you a) plan to take lots of photos with your cellphone and b) may end up near large bodies of water. The waterproof phone holder pouch fits a wide variety of cellphones and is guaranteed air tight, water proof and comes with a convenient lanyard which makes for easy transport.

    I’m hoping these items will add some brightness to your travel plans. Let me know in the comments some of your essential travel items.

    Be inspired, Be informed, Be Glorious!

    Subscribe to the blog here  and share your content suggestions here.

    Kevin

  • Skin Deep: How I keep my skin looking Good!

    Skin Deep: How I keep my skin looking Good!

    If I could travel back in time, I would tell my 14 year old self that when we become an adult, people will randomly compliment us on how good our skin looks.

    The fact is, back then, in the late 90’s, I couldn’t fathom this reality because I thought my skin, especially the skin on my face, was the worst! This wasn’t because I had severe acne issues (although I would get a breakout here and there) however back then, ‘cool’ looking skin was in and I had a perpetual shine/sheen.

    By cool, I mean inhumanly dry skin, which typically would be caused by genetics or frigid winters. Either way that was the goal of the boys and girls in high school, a determination to constantly look ‘cool’ with matte skin, sans makeup, of course.

    They typically achieved this using one of two products: Noxzema or blue cake soap.

    But with age and time I have grown to love my semi-oily skin with its constant sheen. Now instead of referring to it as just shiny, people comment on my glow.

    Before I could finally get a handle on my skin, I had to appreciate it for what it was and understand what it actually needed.

    The Secret

    Several older folks have shared that the ‘secret’ to supple and youthful looking skin, way into old age is “moisturize, moisturize, moisturize!”  I’ve also found that protecting your skin from the sun is an important habit for long term health, not just to stave off premature aging but sunburn and skin cancer.

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    Sun kissed and unfiltered – Me

    So while only a handful of people have ever asked, I am sharing some of the ingredients of my skin and body care regimen. And while genetics probably plays a role in my ‘good looking’ skin, it only goes so far without care.

    My Regimen

    Before I get down to the individual items, I want to share a bit of insight into my basic skin care routine. Additionally, I want to make it clear that I am not giving advice about your skincare. I’m sharing details about the products that I’ve used with the hope that you may discover something that can also help you.

    I follow the tried and true formula: Cleanse, Tone, Moisturize, sun protection + extras and exfoliation thrown in every now and again. This is largely what works for me as it is basic enough to follow and covers all the important must-dos.

    There are also some other products I include for maintenance, especially as I sit on the precipice of age 40.

    Just so you know, some of the product links below are affiliate links. This means that, at zero cost to you, I will earn an affiliate commission if you click through the link and finalize a purchase.

    Cleanse

    The first step in the routine is cleansing and for that I’m currently keeping it very simple. My main go-to cleansing product is the Neutrogena Deep Clean Daily Facial Cleanser. I’ve also been known to use Ari Sulphur acne treatment soap, which is a Jamaican made product. Both are available in local pharmacies at quite reasonable prices. Both have anti-acne ingredients that help to treat or prevent those random adult breakouts.

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    Regardless of what cleanser you choose, key to that process are the items you use to apply them to your skin and the Buf-Puf facial sponge does it better than most!! The sponges come in extra-gentle, gentle and regular texture and really help to distribute the cleanser across my skin, while gently removing dead skin.

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    Toner

    When it comes to using toners I have to admit that I have been a bit less consistent than I would want to be. However I have used either a glycolic acid based toner or my new fave the CeraVe Hydrating Toner which is loaded with the good stuff: 3 essential ceramides, hyaluronic acid and niacinamide. Most importantly it’s alcohol and fragrance free and helps maintain moisture in my skin, which becomes more important as you age. Paula’s Choice also makes a pretty good product but it’s a bit pricey for me.

    Moisturizer

    I typically use a vitamin c infused facial moisturizer but it has been discontinued so I am transitioning to the Cetaphil Daily Hydrating lotion for face with hyaluronic acid.

    In the meantime, a staple in my routine over the past 4 years has been the Nivea Men Sensitive Face Lotion with SPF 15 broad spectrum sunscreen. This serves two purposes: it moisturizes and provides sunscreen protection.

    And while I love the convenience of using a moisturizer that has SPF protection, I like the flexibility of having a standalone moisturizer for those days I don’t actually get sun exposure.

    Sun Protection

    As I said previously, I have been using an SPF infused face lotion for a while, so I only ever used a standalone sunscreen when I go to the beach. That said I recently got the Banana Boat light as air facial sunscreen at 50+ SPF. It goes on easy and there is no annoying white cast when you use it so it’s simple to apply over my facial moisturizer.

    I am also testing out the Cerave Mineral Sunscreen SPF 30 for face which has the typical infusion of skin friendly ingredients the brand is known for and is suitable for sensitive skin.

    The Extras

    This is my favourite part because these products are the ‘in-betweeners’ of my routine and have proven to be life changing.

    Eye Cream

    I fell in love with eye creams ever since I got a free sample from a Kiehl’s store in the US. Since then I have been using different types, specifically creams with caffeine that add a little zing. Recently I discovered a new product that specifically targets dark circles under my eyes – Cardon Dark Circle Eye Rescue.

    I decided to seek out a product like this after doing a photo shoot last year and realizing that whenever I had makeup applied under my eyes, it evened out my entire face. The dark areas under my eyes, created a shadow on my face that basically adds a completely different dimension to my appearance. This eye rescue worked exactly as promised and overtime it has reduced the dark areas under my eyes and removed any puffiness. For what you get, it’s a little pricey but it is completely worth it and will also last a while. Finally, I typically use this before applying moisturizer.

    Masks

    I use masks occasionally, especially when I have been undergoing a bit more stress than usual and need to give myself some added care. The two masks I currently use are made by a local brand Earth Elements and I use both at different times, depending on my mood and what I am trying to adjust in my skin.

    On days when I just need some nourishment, I use the Matcha Green Tea Clay Face Mask that goes on smooth and leave my skin feeling refreshed.

    When I want to calm my skin down I choose the Glacial Clay Facial Mask which has a pleasant cooling and tightening effect. It also goes on smooth and leaves my skin feeling not only tighter but soft and supple.

    Lip Care

    In all things skin, our lips are often overlooked, at our own peril. I have learned from experience that lips need all the love and licking them a million times a day just won’t cut it, so I am always trying out new lip balms. Among the best I’ve ever used is the Kiehl’s Lip Balm #1.

    Using this kept my lips plump and healthy, no stripping in sight and I never had to worry about dryness. And while the price is not the most affordable, my only other drawback was the sheen of the balm itself when applied to my lips – it will give your lip a healthy but distracting shine, which may be triggering to some people who feel that men’s lips should only be a muted matte, not shiny (I have the reactions and comments to prove it).

    On the other side is another fave, Jack Black’s Intense Therapy Lip Balm which also comes loaded with SPF 25 skin protection! Love the way these smell and how long they last, plus they don’t leave any pesky white residue on your lips.

    My most affordable and accessible go-to lip balm is Burt’s Bees specifically the rescue balm series with turmeric. I always keep a few of these around because they do the job and prevent my lips from cracking.

    After Shave Serum

    I shave my head and facial hair myself, so I seldom visit an actual barber. In fact in the past 3 years I’ve only gone to a barber once. The Cantu Shea Butter post-shave soothing serum is my go to whenever I shave. It soothes all that shaved skin and has an understated fragrance.

    A little goes a long way and it usually lasts a while and it is widely available so you can pick it up at any well-stocked pharmacy or beauty supply store.

    Resurfacing Retinol Serum

    Another serum which I swear by is the CeraVe Resurfacing Retinol Serum which does exactly what its name suggests – helps to reveal smooth layers of your skin while reducing the appearance of pores and left over acne marks.

    African Bath Sponge

    Finally, couldn’t do a skin upkeep post without mentioning this gem that I discovered last year, on tik tok no less. The African bath sponge is one of the best things I have ever showered with. It’s so good I have pretty much ditched loofah sponges. It exfoliates while keeping you clean and works well with both bar and liquid soaps.

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    That’s the extent of my current routine and while some of the products may be switched out over time, I keep it simple and sustainable. Regular exercise and water consumption also plays a key role in my skin’s health.

    I would love to know what products and routines you all use to make your skin great. Sharing is caring so let me know in the comments!

    Be inspired, Be informed, Be Glorious!

    Subscribe to the blog here  and share your content suggestions here.

    Kevin

     

  • Wake up and Live! – How I’m living in 2020

    Wake up and Live! – How I’m living in 2020

    Wake Up!

    I woke up one morning and it was the end of 2019 and for the first time in years, I chose not to ring in the new year at a party or event. Instead, I went to bed for a change.

    The year of clear (er) vision, 2020, has been an interesting one so far. I fully counted January as December 2.0 because for me, it was an opportunity to tie up loose ends of the year past. It was in that process that I was able to set some clear goals for the rest of the year and immediately start acting on them.

    I also spent some time looking at the goals I had set for myself in 2019 and for a quick second I was caught up in the idea of how I failed at accomplishing some of those only to realize that on the other side of failure is an opportunity for growth.

    For example, I didn’t complete my must read list of books from last year – boo hoo – but I did make an admirable dent in it. It also seemed that for every deliberate thing that I had set out to do and not fully accomplish, I was able to focus on something else and begin working on that, such as finally opening that stock market account.

    It can be testing telling yourself every day that – ‘I am enough’ – when the world constantly questions that.

    Am I really?

    For real?

    Are you ok?

    And that’s why sometimes I have to sit and really ask myself “Are you ok?”

    That self check-in has given me space to come to terms with how I am really feeling because if it’s one thing I know, not many people are genuinely asking me if I’m ok. For those that do, it is usually heartfelt and a real question, which I appreciate.

    In the new year, I’ve set new goals and I am extremely excited about the challenges and plans I have in store. Specifically, all the new things I am going to learn and put into action. For example, after a little over two years teaching, it’s refreshing being a student again and able to dive into the unknown.

    We’re now almost three months into 2020 and I have a pretty good road map for how I want to make this revolution around the sun a winner for myself in all aspects.

    Taking Care of Me

    There are so many ways I have committed to taking care of myself in the past but one of the primary ways has always been to indulge in whatever my heart desires (mostly), while my pocket could afford. That has proven to be a double edged sword and I now realize more than ever that taking care of myself is more than just a self-care regimen of a good face mask and a pedicure. It also includes conscientiously doing things that won’t cause me unnecessary regret later (hey bad debt). To really take care of myself, means not sabotaging my future with immediate satisfaction that will cost something important in the future, such as my health, wealth, sustenance or sanity. That being said, working on it!

    Focus on solutions

    There is ALOT of stuff that goes wrong every day that risks bogging me down inside my head:

    “Am I being a good friend? Am I being a good son, Am I doing my job well enough?”

    But I’ve taken to focusing on solutions when most of these questions pop up, because in almost every scenario, there is a solution to addressing these internal rumblings. And it usually surrounds choosing the affirmative and moving from there. So where the answer to any of those questions is – “No” the answer is – “I will do better today”. It also means clearing space in my mind and environment for the good to flourish. Good Vibes really make a big difference.

    Keep Moving

    As a follow on to being solutions oriented, it is important to just keep moving. You never get through anything if you don’t continue to move! So just keep going. If it means smelling the roses for a few and taking a breath, do it. What I have learned is that regardless of what I am dealing with, forward motion always takes me into the next chapter, no matter how difficult. Beyond the metaphoric though, I want to keep moving physically as well. I’ve come to realize how important being physical is to my mental and overall health, especially when I was not able to, so now more than ever I’m on a mission to get it done.

    Learning Never Ends

    One of the promises I made to myself this year was to learn as many new things as I could, specifically, things I’ve always wanted to know. And I am pursuing this all for the sake of gaining new knowledge. I have begun and it has been truly rewarding and fulfilling. My mind has opened up to so many new concepts and world’s that I could’ve never imagined before. It also extends to my ability to adapt to the new knowledge and manifesting it in my life. I am able.

    Baked into all of this is a renewed commitment to consistency, something that I have always struggled with (for certain things). I’m awake and I am ready to get it done!

    Be inspired, Be informed, Be Glorious!

    Subscribe to the blog here  and share your content suggestions here.

  • It’s my Birthday! Let’s get nostalgic

    It’s my Birthday! Let’s get nostalgic

    Birthday Tings

    Today marks two important milestones, my blogs’ second year of active existence and my Birthday!!! It was no accident that my blog was launched on my birthday 2 years ago as I needed a momentous occasion to present it to the world and make it live.

    It’s been two years that have seen some major changes in my life, all for the best and thankfully, I’ve been able to chronicle it all using this space on the internets. My understanding of the blogging process has also matured and my commitment to consistency has remained intact, even if what that looks like has changed, overtime.

    I’m going to use this opportunity to do a quick rundown of some of the interesting insights and revelations I’ve made, through this blog over the past couple of years, by taking a look back at a few of the posts that for whatever reason have been memorable.

     

    Favourites to date

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    Over the past two years I’ve been fortunate to write about a lot of different topics. After all, the way my blog is set up allows me to venture across different topics across various interests. But I have two particular favourite s out of all I’ve written.

    My first ever blog post “35 Lessons in 35 years” remains one of my all-time favourite pieces I’ve written, not just because it was the first but because it also serves as a definitive statement on who I am and what I am about. I don’t think I’ve ever opened up this much to any one, much less to the public, all at once.

    My other favourite is a little blog I published in November 2017 entitled, “You can do Whatever you Like”  which I actual go back and read every now and then as a reminder that life is about doing the things that bring me joy, in whatever realm, no excuses.

     

    Stuff I Love that you probably missed

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    I’ve come to realize that I write as much for myself as I do for readers and sometimes, there are just ideas I find so hilariously intriguing I can’t help but write something about it. This was the case in August 2018, while on vacation, when I was inspired to write this sleeper of a blog “Five songs to NEVER play at a wedding”. To this day I still find the pretext funny as the situations around a wedding and possibly playing the ‘wrong’ song can go in weird places.

     

    Biggest Surprise

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    Probably the biggest surprise in the past two years of writing has been the response to two pieces I wrote about my experience selling my old car and buying a new one in Jamaica. The series is entitled “Things to consider when buying and selling a car in Jamaica” parts 1  and 2.

    The articles consistently turn up in searches in google and drives traffic to the site, so it is clear that people are buying and selling cars and now have a resource to get more information. That makes me happy, because the reason I wrote the blogs was because I couldn’t find any information about the process.

    Statement Piece

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    Because I can write about whatever I want, boldness is expected as a standard and there are a lot of avenues I could take to be bold. But I responded to a call to highlight ‘the gay agenda’ that was launched by J-Flag in February 2018. The blog entitled “Bridging the Gap: The Real Agenda” allowed me to simplify and present in my own way the perspective of LGBT Jamaica.

    What connected

    birth

    I guess we can all use some encouragement when it comes to our spending habits, specifically around Christmas time. That’s the only explanation I have for how people responded to the blog post published in December 2017 entitled “4 things you should NOT do with your December salary/bonus”.  Readers flocked to the piece which I consider tongue-in-cheek but with a few nuggets of wisdom and I appreciate that.

    As I celebrate my birthday, another trek around the sun, I’m supremely thankful for life and all the opportunities that come with it. I’ve taken this quick look back as I continue to chart my way forward. Thank you for being part of the journey, for reading, commenting, sharing and enjoying. It means a lot.

    Be inspired, Be informed, Be Glorious!

    Kevin

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  • How a one month break from Instagram shifted my focus

    How a one month break from Instagram shifted my focus

    I have been adrift.

    Somewhat overwhelmed by work, some aspects of life and just the cut and thrust of existing.

    There’s a fix however, that most of us have access to, if we are full time employed: Vacation days! So I decided to take some.

    Even before my vacation time had come, I made a decision quite early that I would temporarily deactivate my Instagram account.

    In my last blog post I mentioned how much of a time suck it is for me. I ended up deactivating a week before going on vacation and the expected FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) never materialized. I ended up remaining off instagram for a little over 4 weeks.

    For the Love

    It’s sometimes hard for me to adequately convey how I feel about the platform. What I know for sure, is that it can devour my time, and some content can be triggering. It doesn’t help that my work revolves around social media, so I usually have need to use the platform more often than not.

    Just to be clear, I LOVE social media.

    It’s through social media that I have been able to make meaningful and lasting connections with people who, with my otherwise introverted self, I would not have had access to. Additionally, it satisfies my insatiable need for information and with a carefully curated list of sources, I’m pretty content with what I am able to access and digest.

    There is however another side to social media that I find tiring – the performance of it all!

    Tiring as opposed to problematic, because I don’t believe that taking and sharing a picture to tell a story about something exciting happening in my life is a problem. I do find tiring, this seeming innate and pathological need to convince the world that ‘I AM OK’.

    Now this is me, I’m not even sure this is what other people feel, but I got to this point where I felt like every post needed to be a visual representation of the fact that, I’m alive, I’m thriving and having the best time of my life. That shit gets tired.

    This is not on Instagram, it’s on me.

    The smiles are never forced, and for the most part I have more good days than bad, but I started questioning this ‘obligation’ to let the world know what and when those were.

    Making it Real

    Over the past couple of years, I’ve actually started to be much more deliberate about what I decide to post on social media, and what aspects of my life I share. But unlike ‘influencers’ and Instagram famous people, who curate their timelines for aesthetics, I simply wanted to keep some things sacred.

    So in a way, I’ve flipped it. Things that I used to feel that I needed to share to allow others to know what’s going on in my life, I feel a bit more protective of, now.

    I threw off what felt almost like a chore and chose to just live and enjoy moments.

    This article written by New York Times tech columnist, Kevin Roose, brought me some eye opening perspective on phone use and how disruptive it can be if left unchecked.

    He untethered from his phone for 30 days, which allowed him to pick up new hobbies, and resulted in him reducing the amount of time he spent using his device.

    My own experience, though much less intense, allowed me to make some important observations. The most revealing, was just how little I know about the lives of my friends and former close acquaintances, even though we are connected via social media.

    Connect (ed)

    Sadly, the invasiveness of social media fools us into believing that we are plugged into the lives of our loved ones… So we know that our friend from high school is getting married, having a baby and just got a promotion.

    But social media is just a balcony with a view.

    In fact I’ll go further and say, social media access to the lives of our friends is merely a pair of binoculars. You can see everything in detail, from miles away, but you’re not really there, involved and participating.

    Being a spectator in the lives of our friends, through social media, is not the same as being involved. I came to this realization, when I didn’t have the same access to some people’s lives, without IG. It became clear, that while we are connected we aren’t truly connecting.

    Just because I have a friend on social media, it doesn’t mean that we are even having regular conversations.

    There are people I have known, who passed away and the last memory I have of connecting with them, was a photo they posted, that I liked.

    Not a call, not an in-person meet up, not even a conversation, just an ephemeral interaction on social media.

    I had to ask myself – “Was that meaningful enough?”

    It isn’t.

    Spark Joy

    Some of us (myself included) may take for granted the people in our lives because, we have virtual access to them on social media but what you see is not always the real deal.

    Because we all have that need to convince the world that we’re doing ok, based on what we post on our social media, it’s not good enough to just keep track.

    I now pursue more meaningful connections with my friends and some other acquaintances, off social media and work to be more present, in general.

    I’m also happy to report that taking a little time away from Instagram had another interesting side effect. I use the platform way less than before, now that I have returned.

    Previously, I depended on the in-app timer to alert me when I reached my 1 hour usage limit for the day. Now, I’m not even being alerted because I spend so few minutes of my day browsing.

    I feel a bit more conscious of the presence of my loved ones and I can truly treasure their presence. Even better, I’m more interested in their lives. This is what being social is truly about for me.

    Be inspired, Be informed, Be Glorious!

    Kevin

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  • Make 2019 Great with these must haves!

    Make 2019 Great with these must haves!

    One of Oprah Winfrey’s greatest gifts to the modern world was her special Oprah Winfrey Show episode that she usually dedicated to her favourite things! It was always around Christmas time and for the lucky souls who were members of the audience they would often walk away with a treasure trove of these items. Nowadays, Oprah still keeps up with her favourite things through amazon.com making access to the finer things within arms length of pretty much everyone.

    http://gph.is/15bRbWf

    I’m no Oprah but I LOVE to shop or just browse, in fact, just the idea of shopping usually excites me. Nothing beats finding a great deal on something that you actually need, or something that’s just too good to pass up.

    I have been fully bought into online shopping since 2003, when I made my very first purchase on Amazon and paid for it with a money order (those were the days).

    We are at the crossroad of celebrating everything that the festive season has to offer and our expectations for the new year.  It had me thinking, what are some of the tangible items I want to share in this in-between time?

    So consider this curated list of items my favourite things but with a much more forward leaning intent that goes beyond Christmas.

    Disclaimer: These items are based solely on my own idiosyncratic shopping habits and legit, things that I’ve used and found incredibly helpful or intend to get ASAP!

     

    Here we go!

    For your lips

    I’m all about putting my best lip forward, especially in 2019 and this product is going to help me keep them looking not only plump but healthy and vibrant, throughout. The Jack Black intense therapy lip balm will do just that.

    Whenever I’m purchasing lip balm, there is usually one ingredient that must be present, Lanolin, because it prevents my lips from stripping. Jack Black also comes loaded with SPF 25, so my lips are protected from UV rays. It comes in some pretty nice flavours too: Natural Mint and Shea Butter; Grapefruit and Ginger; Black Tea and Blackberry; Shea Butter and vitamin E; and lemon and Shea butter.

    Based on the flavours these will work great for both men and women, however don’t expect a high gloss, which is the other reason why I love this lip balm, it isn’t shiny.

    I’m aware of the unit price for each, and while I’m about living that life, I also have an alternative that I’m recommending  – Burts Bees – just in case.

    For your teeth

    I have a storied history with my teeth as I spent most of my younger years with misaligned, spaced out double rows, before getting braces. So the idea of whitening is something I’ve started acknowledging in adulthood. In the past I’ve tried whitening kits with a hydrogen peroxide solution and they worked. However, I’m concerned about the effects of dental sensitivity after prolonged use of hydrogen peroxide, so the effective alternative I’ve found is Active Wow Teeth Whitening Charcoal Powder.

    The main ingredient is organic coconut charcoal which is very finely ground, so it gently works to remove built up stains from your teeth over time and also is good for your gums. It can get a little messy but it works!

    Packing Cubes

    I mentioned packing cubes here before because they were a godsend for travelling and still are. I’ve even gifted these to friends who now swear by them! Packing cubes like these  simply make travel easier, especially when you want keep all your stuff together without losing anything. They come in a variety of colours and brands and are reasonably priced, so choices abound. To be clear, you may not need to use all of them on one trip, but for those that you do use, it will be worth it.

    Passport Holder Cover Case

    And while we are on the travel segment, because that’s one of the subjects that will appear on vision boards every new year, this nifty passport cover is also a great gift for you and your travel companions.

    Not only is it cute, with little pockets to store a host of extra items like credit cards and the like, but this cover also has RFID blocking technology built in. What does that mean?

    Well, RFID is an acronym for “Radio-Frequency Identification” and refers to a technology whereby digital data encoded in tags or smart labels are captured by a reader via radio waves. The RFID blocker prevents unscrupulous people from copying your credit and debit card information with special devices.

    Bluetooth Radio

    Talk about a throwback! Who listens to the radio anymore you might ask? I do and thankfully, with this cute InstaBox multi-functional speaker (radio included) I found one my most used electronic devices for 2018. It makes the perfect bedside clock radio and even has a programmable alarm function for that needed wake up call. What’s even better about it is the remote control. If all that wasn’t enough, it has usb, micro SD and bluetooth connectivity. Handy, inexpensive and cute, it’s a gift that keeps on giving.

    Reusable Bags

    Starting January 1, 2019, Jamaica will ban single use plastic bags, straws and styrofoam containers. So the question on many people’s lips of late has been – “what will I take to the supermarket to get my groceries?”

    Well I was casually browsing amazon and found this great item, which I think, over time will become fairly common in Jamaica. It’s the BagPodz reusable bag and storage system which comes in packs of 5 or 10 and 4 different colours. They’re made of nylon, can hold up to 50 pounds and the best part is, they come with a carry bag.

    The only ‘con’ so far is the size, as they are not the same as some of the tote bags we are used to. However with 10 in total, I’m not that worried.

    I will be getting my own set for the new year and I anticipate that a local producer will make some of these soon, or maybe I should? 

    Sport Towels

    I had made a decision to seriously get back into the gym and get back into the best shape ever. To help myself actualize that process I started preparing by getting things in order and the first item I purchased was a set of towels. In fact these Fit Spirit towels to be exact because, while it would be easy to go and buy some other bath towels, these are micro fiber, stretchy and just a bit more durable than the heavier, cotton based ones.

    Wool Dryer Balls

    A few years ago, through reading I discovered a new way to save money that has changed my whole life. I decided to stop using fabric softener as, not only was it getting more and more expensive, but it was also damaging my clothes. The thing is, fabric softener adds a layer of film over clothing, especially towels. This makes them less effective for drying. I also stopped using dryer sheets for the same reason, so instead, I purchased wool dryer balls. Now these are obviously for persons who use a dryer regularly for their laundry, but they are so useful! If you have a large load, you can use all six, or less for smaller loads. The more you use the less time you have to keep the clothes in the dryer and they help to fluff your clothing, while they dry.

    Laura Alexis Candles

    I could not close this list without adding something made in Jamaica and what a product find it is. Basically, I’m in love with anything made by Laura Alexis Candles. Think artisanal products, all Jamaican made of the highest quality and with cute branding that keeps you guessing. The first thing that struck me about Laura Alexis products was the naming. A candle called “Duppy Conqueror” has quite a ring to it and the fact that it’s made of frankincense and myrrh, is just stupendous! I love the candles, the linen spritzers and the occasional soap that the company makes. Their signature lavender linen spritz smells incredible and actually helps me to sleep. These products have changed my life and thankfully they are available right here in Jamaica.

    There’s my list, they are things I love and they have helped to improve one aspect of my life in some way. I hope that you will find ways to incorporate them into your own life as well.

    Be inspired, Be informed, Be Glorious!

    Subscribe to the blog here  and share your content suggestions here.

    Kevin

  • Adventure Time

    Adventure Time

    We be Rolling

    The carefree days of summer are basically over and while the warmth will continue in Jamaica, there is definitely a feeling that we associate with summer days, such as  holidays and the fact that many of us take vacations during these months.

    I’m no different and I experienced one of my most spontaneous adventures in my homeland recently. It was simple, uncomplicated but a memorable day spent with friends that I’ll never forget.

    What was supposed to be a pretty straight forward drive to the country to see two known attractions turned into an epic road trip and an adventure that I will forever cherish.

    On the move

    I aim to be very deliberate about how I interact with Jamaica because I don’t ever want to make the mistake of not realizing what a gem this country is, if and when I am someplace else.

    That said, there are so many unspoiled, nooks and crannies all over Jamaica, you could choose to go on an adventure every weekend and never be bored.

    I see the term ‘self care’ bandied about a lot, and I appreciate the focus on all of us taking better care of ourselves, in every way that matters. Like everything else in life, self care is something that must be deliberately pursued and done, therefore, discovering my country and relaxing is a big part of my regimen.

    So in the name of self care and just going on an adventure, I decided that St Elizabeth would be the location for this jaunt.

    The Mission

    The mission was simple I, along with two of my friends, would leave Kingston for a day of fun and relaxation at a body of water in St Elizabeth, specifically, YS Falls. The idea was to spend the day enjoying the cool waters of YS Falls, which is fed by the YS river.

    Glen (center) and Jaevion (right) are the best roadies ever!

    Getting to St Elizabeth was a breeze, thanks to the highway and our first photo stop was Holland Bamboo, which despite some wear and tear still has an unmistakable allure. The long and busy stretch of road is surprisingly good for photo ops, which we took advantage of. Just be careful when standing in the middle of the road for those awesome shots, because… road safety.

    Holland Bamboo is always a mood!

    We made our way to the road leading to the YS Falls attraction, which at a point is surrounded by rolling green pastures that are home to cows and horses. When we finally arrive at the YS reception center however, we were advised that due to rains the previous day the waters at the falls were muddy and brown.

    Unexpected Turns – It’s an Adventure

    Here began the unexpected day, because this was not part of the plan. We decided to skip YS Falls and head to Little Ochi seafood restaurant in Alligator Pond, Manchester. There was time, so instead of simply turning around, we took a route that I had never been attempted before and went into the hills of St Elizabeth using a curvy country road, leading to Maggotty.

    We drove through Maggotty with hope of finding a body of water, specifically, Breadnut Valley Falls, which is just outside the town.

    Unfortunately, it was closed and not accessible, so we continued on our journey to Little Ochi, which is actually located on the coast of Manchester.  The restaurant is so close to the border with St Elizabeth, it’s often misplaced by some people as part of the parish.

    I never realized that the southerly road to little ochi was so long. It took about 30 minutes to drive down to the restaurant, which sits on the coast, from the foot of Spur Tree Hill.

    adventure

    The quintessential meal order from Little Ochi – Escoveitch Fish

    Little Ochi on any given day is either a hit or a miss and on this day it was a hit! It wasn’t crowded and the service was quick and pleasant. They had a good selection of nice sized fish to choose from and cooked them up to our delight.

    Parts Unknown

    This is the part of the journey where the real adventure begins. As we were approaching Little Ochi, we came upon an intersection, with a sign that pointed to a road to the left that led to Milk River in Clarendon. So we decided pretty early that we would make our way back to Kingston using that route.

    Now, even though Jamaica is an island, many of us (myself included) prefer to think that the parish of Manchester has no coast. In fact, I’ve just always assumed that the coast of Manchester was inaccessible because it was all cliffs and ridges, well, I learned different.

    Once we were done grubbing at Little Ochi, we made our way along this road that was flanked by   hills to the left and untouched beaches to the right. Pretty soon however, it became clear that this roadway wasn’t one that was frequently used. We figured this out as we noticed ‘macca trees’ that flanked the road on both sides start to get closer the further we went.

    What started out as a relatively wide road, became more and more deserted, winding and smaller the further we went. I actively considered turning back at points until at a particularly narrow section we encountered our first and only other motorist. It was a bit of a challenge allowing him to pass. By this time, we could no longer see the coast because we were surrounding by bush on all sides! We started referring to the span as “The Road that Shouldn’t be There.”

    Gut River

    We were making our way down the winding, uneven and almost completely covered roadway when we came upon a clearing and saw a group of people emerging from bushes on the left side of the road. When we looked to the right, we saw a gate and a sign, welcoming us to the Gut River Beach Village.

    adventure
    The sign announcing the Gut River Beach Village. Look out for it or you might miss it!

    Before that day I had never really known about this place but the sign said it all, River and Beach, we had found our water. We were also pleasantly surprised to see a number of other vehicles at the location that had brought campers to the site, apparently for the weekend.

    The beach village has seen better days but the natural beauty cannot be denied. The gateway opened into a yard and just beyond it a small stream that is a breakaway from the river cuts a path through the property, with its crystal clear waters.

    adventure

    This stream gave us a small taste of Gut River

    Beyond that was the warm waters of the Caribbean Sea, crashing against the south coast of Manchester.

    • Adventure
    • adventure

    Gut River is a revelation! The water is cold but clear and at the roadway where the river emerges, is a deep ‘blue hole’ where water bubbles up from the hills and flows to the ocean – perfect for swimming and diving.

    adventure

                  The cold, crystal clear waters of the Gut River… so refreshing!

    We were able to spend a good chunk of time enjoying the warm water and the particularly flat beach and black sand before we emerged once again and dipped in the cool waters of Gut River (Gut is a shortened version of the german word for Good, apropos I think).

    When we eventually left and made our way back on the road, the winding continued through what seemed like never ending wilderness until we  reached Canoe Valley, and it’s major attraction the Alligator Hole  River and its accompanying game sanctuary, which is home to manatees and crocodiles.

    • adventure

    Part of the Alligator hole protected area

    That was the last major point of interest before we eventually re-emerged into civilization in Clarendon. We discovered, later that the roadway we used to get to Gut River was called the South Coast Road.

    Doing New Things

    What has made me so smitten with this journey was the fact that I felt like a foreigner in my own homeland. Jamaica is so beautiful and there is so much for us to see and experience, but access is important. The fact that the road to this pristine location on a seemingly remote coastal region of Jamaica is in disrepair, is something to ponder about. Not many people know Gut River or the wonders of this portion of Jamaica’s South Coast.

    I’m glad that I am able to take trips like this and have friends to enjoy it with but I am also cognizant of others who for whatever reason, don’t have the same luxury.

    If you are able, find those places across your homeland that you have left undiscovered and live!

    Share with me some of the hidden gems in Jamaica that you are familiar with in the comments section.

    Be inspired, Be informed, Be Glorious!

    Kevin

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  • Pushing Through

    Pushing Through

    The first two months of 2018 have been quite interesting for me as I’ve been hit with a case of fatigue and lethargy which are both exacerbated by a bad case of insomnia.

    Two very important things have become critical to ensuring that I don’t self-sabotage and just say – SCREW IT to all the goals I’ve set for 2018.

    I’ve sought out small victories to help propel me onward to try and achieve the other larger goals that I have. For example, 2018 is my declared year of Reading, but imagine my quandary with the fact that it’s almost the end of February and I’ve completed only one book so far. Finishing that book was such a vindication, and prevented me from otherwise beating myself up. I’m in the middle of two others though, so that counts as progress. I press on.

    The other saving grace has been the recognition that the difficult moments are no time to slack off. There have been days I feel like just can’t bother to do anything but the mundane – work, home, sleep – repeat. But then I realize that pushing through is what it’s all about.

    I usually begin a 5k or 10k race wondering “what have I gotten myself into?” and I often ask myself the question “Can I finish this race?” Not only do I usually finish, but I feel good while doing so, proving to myself time and time again that the joy is in the journey, trials and all.

    Now that I’ve set the stage and you have a better idea of where I am, let’s talk a bit about Lent.

    Things we Give Up

    I never pay the custom any mind, because the point of making a sacrifice never quite made sense to me. However from a purely self-serving point-of-view I could see how making a deliberate effort to form a new habit, or destroy a bad one, can work in my favour.

    Well, this year, I took a few moments on Ash Wednesday and decided to give up something for Lent – Online Shopping!

    I hate to think that I am addicted to anything, but in reality my mind is always convinced that everything that I ever purchase online, I absolutely need. No matter how small or inconsequential, I need(ed) it. And the thing is I abhor hoarding so always buying stuff, that I probably don’t need is just not something I can cope with.

    I have forty days to free myself of online shopping and all the triggers that get me to do it. For example, I recall being in line at a restaurant waiting for my food and I just happened to be on my phone, browsing the amazon app. While browsing I came upon a shoe that I had been watching for a quick minute and decided to buy it, because – great price.

    It’s literally that easy, takes not time and is right at the click of a button.

    The only exception is the payment for road races that I may choose to run over the period, and that will only be if I can’t pay for them in another way.

    This is my confession and this is how I’m handling it. It’s been just over two weeks and I haven’t cracked though temptations abound.  I follow blogs and retailers that constantly send me emails reminding that sales are on, or open my eyes to new products, but I must resist, resist, resist.  Online shopping isn’t a bad thing but the disconnect that it causes between want, need and cost is.

    Every day I overcome the temptation to buy something online, is yet another victory for me to feel that much better about myself, and keeps me pushing on to the next goal.

    What’s helping you to push through? Let me know in the comments.

    Be inspired, Be informed, Be Glorious!

    Kevin

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